The healing in holding

Wedding photos in Justin, TexasI have a couple cute stories to share with you. Over the past month, Brent and I have been leaning on each other to get through the throes of major changes, a new marriage and another move. For me, this is my 6th move in 3.5 years. I’ve lived in 3 states and 5 cities during that time. I’m really tired of finding new friends, new jobs and setting up my home all over again.

Brent just retired from the military, and he’s been here in Shreveport for the past 7 years. He’s not used to moving as much as I am, but with his deployments and being stationed at different bases around the U.S., he’s ready to settle down too.

We’re ready to put down roots and let them grow deep into the dusty, cracked Texas earth. I don’t think either one of us could stand another day longer than the 2 weeks we had left. It was time to be home.

This past week was especially draining for me. I’ve had stomach problems, had a major fall, pain from another condition and have been just a total crab. Three times during the past 2 weeks, I stayed in bed, sleeping nearly all day long. Fatigue seemed to swallow me whole.

One night, we had just turned off the lights and were laying in bed. My back was to Brent, and I was holding a couple of pillows under my arms. Out of no where, Brent pulls me back toward his chest, nestles my head gently between his pillows and mine, coils his arms around me and then rests his own head on mine. Could he be any sweeter?

I needed that tenderness. I felt whole there wrapped up in his big ole’ bear paws. It was so healing.

A couple nights ago, somewhere after midnight and before dawn, we were sleeping (at least I was) and Brent was facing me. He pulled me into another magical embrace, tilted my head down toward his chest and softly rested his chin on my hair. He rubbed my head and ran his fingers through my auburn hair, even though I was nearly asleep. I remembered it the next morning, and brushed tears from my eyes when I recounted the moment to Brent.

I had no idea how healing marriage is. I’ve been held and hugged by people in my life before — friends, family, Toby — but never was there an embrace like those from my husband. Knowing that he just wanted to be close to me chased all my fears away and let my heart fly high above the striving we’re facing.

Sometimes I feel like I literally married an angel.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s