To have a silent night


Bays Christmas Card FinalMarriage issues can be so complex and hard to understand.

The sacrament of marriage is so special to our planet that often times we elevate it to near god-like status in our lives (shout out to all the husband-seeking women out there!), which of course is not good.

Then again, sometimes it’s unclear how vital healthy marriages are to our human race and we miss out on the richness of at-one-ment. Here’s what I mean (holiday version):

  • In our haste to find the perfect gift for our spouse we run over him, totally forgetting that we are so desperate for the greatest present, not because of how much he will love us for getting it, but because of how much we love him.
  • He’s so worried about making extra cash to pay for all those Christmas presents that he gets overworked and she gets overlooked.
  • Wives, can’t you see yourself snapping at your husband because you burned the Christmas cutout cookies?

This year is Brent and my first Christmas as a married couple. We opted to celebrate sans-presents for several reasons, but so far it’s been one of the brightest holiday seasons to date for me. We’re getting to spend a whole lot of time together, learning about each other and learning how we can bless each other.

Sometimes, the biggest blessing might come wrapped in “alone time,” free of distraction. At other times, it’s a simple promise to come check on him when he’s working on some homework. Pretty much daily it’s packaged in a lovely dinner that I didn’t have to make.

On Christmas Eve, we’ll head to our new home church to warm our hearts by the incense of worship. Then we’ll have a look at the Christmas decorations and lights at the Fort Worth Stockyards before driving back home under the clear indigo sky and silvery-white stars. I see mugs full of hot chocolate stirred with candy canes in our hands, keeping us warm beside the glow of a midnight fire behind the hearth. Maybe a dance or two to Josh Groban crooning from his Christmas album.

And all will be well because we’ll be investing in each other and in our marriage, even without spending a dime.